🌿 I took the kids to uni with me today & they were great.. But then.. I’d let my son bring his iPad to play during my class which was fine throughout the hour but then he didn’t want to give it back to me.
🌿 Embarrassing, he didn’t have a meltdown as such but was resistant to give it back to me and challenged me in front of my lecturer.
🌿 So I didn’t let him have it back to play with in the car, which lead to tears, flapping of limbs and moaning. This is them both now 👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽
🌿 Now I’m sitting on the driveway to enjoy the peace and quiet. The neighbours will think I’m weird. Not worth disturbing this peace to avoid opinions 🤣
🌿 The point I’d like to make is that a few years ago I would have been so devastated, so angry, so upset at his public display of defiance and challenging my authority.
❌ I’d have internalised what happened and listed all the ways in which it was my fault in my head.
❌ I’d have glared at every single person we passed from that point untill I was in the car assuming they were thinking the worst about my capabilities as a mother.
❌ I’d have been so anxious I’d have made mistakes like stalling the car, dropping things, breaking things.
🌿 But that was then, and this is now.
💗 Now I know I do my best and that’s fucking good enough.
💗 Now I know other people’s opinions are irrelevant. I R R E L E V A N T
(& they probably aren’t thinking about me anyway!)
💗 Now I know that him challenging my authority is actually not a bad thing. He’s asserting himself. He’s testing boundaries. And it makes me a better parent for adapting the skills required to establish those boundaries and teaching him to respect my authority. And teaching me to explain why sometimes parents have to take an authoritative stand point.
( I want you to take care of your iPad. You need to hold my hand across the road to be safe. Your iPad needs to be in your back to it stays safe and doesn’t get dropped, broken or pinched. We need to pay attention when we are walking through the city, across roads etc.)
🌿 To any parent dealing with a public mealtdown, worrying about other people’s opinions, questioning if your doing a good job.
💗 YES YOU ARE! 💗 Because if you weren’t you wouldn’t be thinking about any of that!
You are there, you are showing up, you are doing the damn thing and doing your best. 👏🏻
🌿 I am so relieved I don’t think, feel and behave like that anymore. At the time I thought there was no way of changing how it felt. But now I am proof there is.
ANXIETY? – GONE ✅
DEPRESSION? – GONE ✅
STRESS? – GONE ✅
🌿 Ok I have bad days, shit happens, I wouldn’t even call them bad days anymore, they are moments that pass. 😌
And it can be the same for you too. Give yourself a break.
Make time to do what makes YOU FEEL GOOD.👌🏻
🌿Chin up & #FeelFabulous because YOU are.💗💁🏻